RE: Teppen

You know, I’ve got to hand it to Kingdom Hearts III.  Not only is it a game I still actively despise nearly a year after its release (to the letter, no less), but it’s also the one game in my time blogging that’s actually managed the impossible: it made me throw out a post I was working on because it wasn’t up to snuff -- and bringing it to par would have tacked on at least three thousand more words.  Also?  It feels pointless to talk about it until the DLC comes out, so I can finally close the book on my most disappointing game of 2019.

Speaking of 2019?  Devil May Cry V is my 2019 Game of the Year, and I almost wrote about that instead.  But given how…certain upcoming events (as of writing) may or may not play out, I think I’ll hold off before I instantly date myself with the opening ramble.  So as a substitution?  Here’s another game that’s in my Top 5 of 2019.

It’s Teppen time, y’all.  Because man, I seriously love this game.

Let’s discuss Devil May Cry V (FINALE).

Before I begin, I’d like to take a moment to admit that -- as of this writing -- I have “Devil Trigger”, “Subhuman (Game Edit)”, and “Crimson Cloud” downloaded and embedded in my phone. With a little “Unwavering Bravery” for good measure.

Now let me give Devil May Cry V the sendoff it deserves.

I will suffer

I will burn

Let hate prevail

Enslave my soul

But I’ll never surrender

Wait…damn it, wrong song!  Well, whatever.  Spoilers.

Let’s discuss Devil May Cry V (Part 1).

When I finished Devil May Cry V, I was frustrated.  

Not because I didn’t like the game, oh no.  Of course not; as a wise man once said, I’m absolutely crazy about it.  My issue is that, despite doing relatively well throughout my first playthrough (and thus on the standard difficulty), I ended up botching the series-standard mid-credits fights.  Did that lock me out of content?  It doesn’t seem like it.  But those are bragging rights -- no, a sense of accomplishment I wanted, in case I never got the chance to play the game again.

Even though I’ve long since cleared DMCV, I want to play it again.  On a harder difficulty, especially.  Why?  As another wise man once said, I need more power.  I want to improve -- sharpen my skills and steel my will, so I have the talent and courage needed to truly pull off my own unique combos.  The stuff truly worthy of the announcer bellowing “SMOKIN’ SEXY STYLE!”  My pride is on the line here -- and I have some of the finest gameplay I’ll likely see all year to thank for that.  

Now I guess it’s up to me to explain why.

YOU CANNOT KILL ME

I AM OMEGA (spoilers)

YOU CANNOT KILL ME

I AM SUBHUMAN (also spoilers)

Devil May Cry V is STRONG.

At the time of this writing, I’m about two and a half hours past clearing Devil May Cry V.  What did I think of it?  

What a mystery.  If only there was a blog post title people could read.

Blindsided by Spider-Man

Well, it was either this, or another post on politics.  And nobody cares about that, right?  Everything’s fine and dandy, with America on the upswing.  We can trust everyone in office right now, and rest easy for years to come.

It’s super bad, thooooooooooooooooough.

(But darkly hilarious)

So let’s talk about Marvel’s Spider-Man, a game whose biggest fault right now is the name.  Seriously, I wish they had called it something else so a Google search wouldn’t mistake it for Spidey or Marvel Comics in general.  But whatever.  

Let’s get stuck in.

RE: Marvel’s Spider-Man (PS4)

All right, I’m going to make this as quick a post as I can.  Why?  Because the sooner I finish, the sooner I can play more Marvel’s Spider-Man.  

The Emissary from Hell has arrived.  And I couldn't be happier.

Let’s discuss All Might.

I want to start this off by saying, yes, I like My Hero Academia.  I like it a lot.

I’m not just saying that because it’s popular, or because other people like it.  This anime (and the manga by extension) is legit.  Scarily so.  It’s not hard to see the machinery behind it, and its attempts at emotional torque -- but the execution here is generally at such a high level, it almost always works.  I’ve gotten the chills.  I’ve stifled the gasps.  And I’m about two steps short of starting a tally of how many times I tear up.  It’s getting pretty high up there.

Am I being emotionally manipulated?  Probably.  Am I an easy mark for this sort of thing?  Probably.  But until proven otherwise, I’m happy to say that, well, I’m happy with My Hero Academia.  There are plenty of viable reasons to point to -- to identify as successes -- with the chief one being the horrifically-lovable cast.  Certainly, All Might is among them.

But here’s the thing.  The deeper I go with the anime, the more I realize something.  I like All Might not because he’s Not-Quite-Anime Superman.  I like him because the more I think about him, the more I suspect he’s actually the worst…which is why he’s the best.

RE: Black Panther

I both love and hate the position Black Panther has put me in.

I hate it because it’s going to make me look like I’ve got less brainpower than a dead goldfish.  It seems like being a Marvel movie is basically an anathema these days, to the point where the mere mention of one can, at best, draw responses of “Yep, another one.”  At worst?  I’d prefer not to think about it, because how dare I enjoy a mainstream product by a major corporation, or something to that effect.  And now here I am, about to sing praises about the newest movie -- about to clap my hands like a seal because I, and many others, have been conditioned to go “Yeah, another one!”

Despite that, I love the position I’m in.  I’m wary of saying this about the movie because it is the newest to date, and it is another one to throw on the pile.  But…yeah.  I think this the best one yet.  I’ve seen 15 out of 18 of these movies, and it’s the best one.

And I’m not just saying that because I’m black, and most of the cast is black.  So you in the back with your hand raised?  Put your hand down, imaginary idiot I’m calling out.

Let’s discuss Kamen Rider Ex-Aid (Part 1).

Okay, I know this is a post about Kamen Rider Ex-Aid, but I’m seriously just biding my time until I can start watching Kamen Rider Build.

Setting aside the main Rider’s design (which, as a reminder, is infinitely superior to Ex-Aid’s), I had a hunch that it would turn out to be pretty interesting.  I mean, come on.  How often do you get a genius scientist as a lead hero?  That’s worth some brownie points right there.  At most I’ve only seen a handful of clips and previews, but apparently the story’s about to take a turn into some bold new territory I can’t wait to get the context behind.  Also, they’re bringing back a Kamen Rider alum for a new role, and that’s got me pretty hyped.  “Oh!  It’s that guy!” I cheered.  “Wait, who’s that guy again?  Let me check…OH!  IT’S THAT GUY!”

I guess if KR has taught me anything, it’s that I should trust my instincts a bit more.  It’s optimal to act on solid evidence and knowledge, but there are times when it’s fine to listen to your gut.  I say as much, because prior to Ex-Aid’s release I had a hunch that it was going to be good.  Lo and behold, I was right.  More importantly, I was right in the best way possible.  Ex-Aid had the perfect setup for the most impactful, in-depth exploration of its themes in a KR installment yet, so they just needed to pounce on the chance.  They did exactly that.

…Well, mostly.  But “mostly” is better than “not at all”.  So let’s get to it.

LET’S GAME!  MECTHA GAME!  MUTCHA GAME!  WHAT’S YOUR NAME?!

I’M A MAJOR SPOILER(S)!

Re: ARMS

This may come as a surprise, but I think that ARMS might be a weird game.  I don’t know, I haven’t quite decided yet.

Let’s discuss Mumen Rider.

Okay, so I know that I’ve said some controversial stuff on this blog before -- COUGHunchartedCOUGH -- but I don’t think anyone’s going to take too much issue with what I have to say next: Mumen Rider is the best character in One Punch Man.  And that’s saying something, if you ask me.

Though while we’re on the subject?  Let me back up and say that One Punch Man is, on the whole, a pretty freakin’ good anime.  Its popularity may have surged relatively recently -- and thus people have likely started throwing stones at it -- but much like JoJo or Attack on Titan, I’d say that that popularity is deserved.  And now that I’ve said that, I’m just going to spend the rest of this post gushing over how freakin’ sick Mumen Rider is as a character.  Like, I would absolutely be down for a full-on Mumen Rider series -- not spinoff, but series -- starring the cyclist for justice.  Granted it’s not a guaranteed success, but…hey, it’d at least be something that caters to me.  And that’s what matters most.

Now everybody sit down and shut up, because Mumen Rider said so.  Or someone of relative import.

JoJo’s Bizarre Adventure: All Star Blogging (Part 4)

I should probably start off this post by making something very clear.  There are tons of factors that decide whether a story -- a game, a movie, a book, a TV show, or whatever -- is good.  Even if that’s true, I think we can all agree that characters make up a good chunk of those factors.  As I’ve said, characters create opportunities; if they’re engaging, then they can take an audience to some incredible highs.  If they’re bad, then it’s the equivalent of jamming Mount Olympus into your eyeball.

It’s pretty easy to throw around the claim that “characters should be likable”.  And yeah, that’s a big part of it.  But let’s not get bogged down by strict definitions; “likable” doesn’t have to mean that the character is an admirable, noble member of society.  He or she doesn’t have to be a bang-up hero, because otherwise we would ignore villains by default.  It’s about making sure that, by writing and/or design, there’s something compelling about a character.  That should be understood by everyone, because it’s certainly something understood by JoJo’s Bizarre Adventure and its creator, Hirohiko Araki.

So now that I’ve said all that, let me make a claim about Battle Tendency.  A huge chunk of the named characters are assholes.  And that’s awesome.

Your next line is…

What?  You didn’t tell me there were SPOILERS in this post!

…Except I kind of did.  I lead in with this red text for a reason, people.

JoJo’s Bizarre Adventure: All Star Blogging (Part 1)

JoJo’s Bizarre Adventure is more than just memes.

I repeat: JoJo’s Bizarre Adventure is more than just memes.

I’m not going to sit here and tell you it’s a masterpiece, or the greatest thing ever (in the anime/manga world or otherwise).  I know I’ve said this before, but I have to make it absolutely clear: paring down JoJo to a bunch of images and out-of-context YouTube clips is a huge disservice to it.  It’s lasted this long for a reason.  It has fans for a reason.  It’s got a brand new, still-in-progress anime for a reason.  There are many, many, many things you can pull from a decent-sized chunk of said anime -- most of it accidentally hilarious -- but if you look at it as a whole, it’s truly something special.

So here’s the big question, and one that I hope to answer over the course of this miniseries: is it really as bizarre as the title claims?  It’s hard to say for now.  But if I’m going to come to a conclusion, I’ve got to start somewhere -- and it might as well be at the beginning.

SONO CHI NO SADAME!

SPOIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIILERS! 

Tales of Zestiria: I Want You

I have a lot to thank my mom for, but I’d wager that my general avoidance of sweets is one of them.  It’s not that I have anything against candy (except chocolate, because I’m secretly history’s greatest monster), but I don’t go out of my way to get my hands on it.  Same goes for stuff like cake and ice cream; honestly, a few weeks ago I had Pop-Tarts for the first time in years.  As a result, I’ve never known the pain of cavities.  Likewise, I’d imagine that axing the most heinous of food groups has helped me keep my figure svelte and lithe -- and not at all comparable to a skin-clad sack of bones.

Still, I know the taste of sweets.  I know the effect.  There are just some foods out there that are pure bliss in edible form; I’d count a warm blueberry muffin among them, for example.  Will eating sweets lead to regret later?  Possibly.  Probably, if they aren’t eaten in moderation.  On the other hand, sometimes you just have to indulge and take in whatever you can get.  Sometimes you just have to spoil yourself.

That’s what Tales of Zestiria does for me.  Because the more I think about it, the more I realize I’m absolutely in love with this game.

RE: Ace Attorney

Real talk: I have no idea what jury duty means.  And at this rate, I doubt I ever will.

RE: Overwatch

So you know what I realized?  Overwatch is the first game I’ve ever bought for the PC.

No, really.

No, really.

No, really.

Let’s discuss Street Fighter V (Part 2).

So in the last post, it sounded like I was pretty hard on Street Fighter V -- and I hate that it had to come out that way.  I wanted to sing about the game’s praises from dawn till dusk for the next eight months.  But with so many complaints and controversies spiraling around the game -- with more than enough justification -- it’s not like I can bury my head in the sand.  People that are angry have a right to be angry.  Those who are shaking their heads at Capcom have the grounds to do so.  The SFV launch is appreciable for releasing sooner rather than later, but it did so in a less-than-ideal state.

At least, that’s what it says on paper.  But the devs dumped a lot of time and effort into the actual game, and it shows.  I’m not going to say this is the best SF ever, because I’m way out of my depth on that one.  But this is still an amazing SF game, if you ask me.  It’s certainly my favorite Capcom fighter in recent years, since it’s got a lot going for it.  Chief among them, the music.  Survival Mode’s taken some heat, but everything was forgiven when I first heard the Congratulations jingle.

IT’S SO GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOD.  But anyway, let’s talk about the actual game.

PS4nukkah: Bloodborne

I’m an idiot.

That should be blatantly obvious by now, because collectively I’ve blown about a hundred hours on the modern-day Final Fantasy games, and cleared one of its latest entries before I even touched Bloodborne.  I remedied that eventually, and while I’ve already said some stuff about the game already -- good things, no less -- I can’t emphasize it enough.  Bloodborne is a good-ass game.  If you haven’t played it and you have a PS4, go play it.  Especially now, since the DLC expansion The Old Hunters is out, AND there’s a game of the year edition that has it packed in.

But let’s get back to the matter at hand.  See, it’s been months -- literal months -- since the last time I booted up Bloodborne.  I pretty much forgot how to play, so I figured it’d be best if I started over with a new character and file.  As such, I made a new version of my old mainstay, Blackules; I just barely made it to the second boss (on accident) the first time around, but I hoped I’d do much better with a new hunter by my side.  And the initial run would have gone a lot better if I wasn’t a complete idiot.

I forgot how to heal -- and ended up assuming that I couldn’t heal until later in the game.

And you know what?  It might have actually made me -- if not the game in general -- even better.

So How Good is Star Trek, Really?

Does it make me more of a nerd to admit that I think Star Trek is really cool?  Or does it make me less of a nerd because I’m only just now admitting that in writing?

I guess I should start by saying that in this case, I’m talking specifically about Star Trek: The Next Generation, because I happened to catch a few episodes of those recently.  But I’m not opposed to any of the others.  Quite the opposite; when I was a little baby Voltech I used to drift off to sleep thanks to the lulling tones of reruns for TNG, Deep Space Nine, and Voyager.  (Not Enterprise, though -- I don’t remember there being any reruns, at least none that threw themselves at me.)  Most of the show’s dialogue was lost on me, naturally, but these days?  If and when I catch reruns of TNG, I find myself pulling a Shulk and going “I’m really feeling it!”

In all honesty, though, I’m still a greenhorn when it comes to the franchise.  So what do you say we unpack this for a bit?  I’m sure it won’t be that hard, seeing as how it’s already off to a strong start.  As if you needed a reminder that SPACE IS AWESOME.

Let’s discuss Gundam Build Fighters Try.

There’s a part of me that wants to load up this post with all the spoilers I can, and that’s largely because this is a sequel series.  Gundam Build Fighters Try is the second season, while the vanilla Gundam Build Fighters is the first; you can technically get away with skipping the first season, but I wouldn’t recommend it because of just how GOOD the first season is.  That puts me in a situation where I have to not spoil either season, but also where in order to explain what’s good, I have to spoil things in one, the other, or both.  For anyone who wants to go in blind, that’s a problem.

So I guess there’s only one way to handle it: to spoil as needed in the paragraphs to come.  For those who are already willing to give it a shot, here’s a spoiler-free rundown.  Is Build Fighters Try good?  Yes.  Did I enjoy watching it?  Yes.  Is it better than the first season?  No.  Are there flaws?  Yes.  Is this season enough to sour me to the franchise?  Not even close; I’m waiting with bated breath for the announcement of a third season.

Now then.  Let’s get started.  With more spoilers than you can shake a beam saber at.