Let’s discuss Kamen Rider Ex-Aid (FINALE).

I thought of something else I like about Emu from Kamen Rider Ex-Aid: his ability to bring disparate (and routinely awful) people together for a good cause.  That’s probably not a unique trait among protagonists -- count how many of Goku’s allies once tried to kill him or his friends -- but it’s still something I appreciate here.  As part of his character arc, Emu has to learn how to work with others so that he can be more than just an MLG pro gamer; by learning how to trust others and accept his limits, he evolves as a Rider, a doctor, and a person.  The ultimate proof of his growth comes late in the series, where he makes a choice that comes off as strikingly dark in the context of Ex-Aid.  It’s for a good cause, but still.  Yikesy mikesy.

I wish that Emu had a better supporting cast along the way, because anyone not named Emu on the heroes’ side is tolerable at best (IMO, of course).  Admittedly that would take the punch out of his arc, and to be fair steal whatever good moments the others can muster, but they go a long way to make the journey to the final episode a rough one.  But even so, there is a saving grace.

If you’re just tuning in, then I’ll say it upfront: Ex-Aid is worth watching just to see its villains.

I’LL CLEAR THIS POST WITH NO CONTINUES!

(Just tons of spoilers.)

Let’s discuss Kamen Rider Ex-Aid (Part 3).

Here’s a friendly PSA for any anime fans reading this: Gundam Build Divers is out and about online, and you can watch it for free either on Crunchyroll or via the GundamInfo channel on YouTube.  The same goes for Gundam Build Fighters -- the first season -- Build Fighters Try -- the second season -- and all sorts of bonus, post-season content.  The Battlogue episodes are as non-canon as it gets, but each one is a sight to behold.  Least of all because the budget for each 11-minute segment seems to have gone Trans-Aa.  YIKESY MIKESY, some of those moments are slobberknockers.

It’s been a while since I’ve seen anything Build Fighters related, but having taken the plunge with the supplementary stuff -- in preparation for Divers’ drop -- I’m reminded of how much I freaking love this installment to the Gundam franchise.  Granted I’ll gladly admit that Try is a step down from the first season, but seeing these guys in isolated instances shows what a deep appreciation I have for the overall cast and affect.  We’re a decade out from Gurren Lagann (feeling old yet?), but GBF is holding the hot-blooded mecha action down.  All hail Tryon-3.

If you’re wondering why I’m talking about Gundam in a Kamen Rider post, it’s because I need a release valve for the scorn and disdain I feel for a not-insignificant chunk of the cast.  So let’s start off this post with a few words on tone.

LET’S SPOIL!

BAD SPOIL!

DEAD SPOIL!

WHAT’S YOUR SPOIL?!

THE SPOILERS!

Let’s discuss Kamen Rider Ex-Aid (Part 2).

So Kamen Rider Ex-Aid might have the biggest time paradox I’ve ever personally seen.

Main character Emu may start the show as a medical intern, but he’s also the “genius gamer” M -- and through a flashback, the audience gets to see what that entailed.  Apparently he was an ace at fighting games (at a bare minimum), and took home the grand prize in a major tournament.  In what game?  My ears perked up at the sights and sounds of Tekken, as they should.  But that’s when time sort of collapses on itself.

Emu’s playing Tekken 7, the latest installment in the franchise to date.  Fair enough…until you remember that that game came out in March 2015 at the earliest, at least in Japan and in arcades.  The flashback in Ex-Aid specifically states that Emu joined that tournament in 2010.  And it’s pretty hard to pretend he’s playing any other installment, because A) he’s using Lars’ latest costume, and B) his opponent is using Lucky Chloe, who first made her debut in T7.  I mean, jeez.  I know Japan got the game a few years before the west, but this is ridiculous.

But I wouldn’t worry about time paradoxes too much.  Ex-Aid has bigger problems.  Much, much bigger problems.

GACCHAN!  SPOILERS UP!!

Let’s discuss Kamen Rider Ex-Aid (Part 1).

Okay, I know this is a post about Kamen Rider Ex-Aid, but I’m seriously just biding my time until I can start watching Kamen Rider Build.

Setting aside the main Rider’s design (which, as a reminder, is infinitely superior to Ex-Aid’s), I had a hunch that it would turn out to be pretty interesting.  I mean, come on.  How often do you get a genius scientist as a lead hero?  That’s worth some brownie points right there.  At most I’ve only seen a handful of clips and previews, but apparently the story’s about to take a turn into some bold new territory I can’t wait to get the context behind.  Also, they’re bringing back a Kamen Rider alum for a new role, and that’s got me pretty hyped.  “Oh!  It’s that guy!” I cheered.  “Wait, who’s that guy again?  Let me check…OH!  IT’S THAT GUY!”

I guess if KR has taught me anything, it’s that I should trust my instincts a bit more.  It’s optimal to act on solid evidence and knowledge, but there are times when it’s fine to listen to your gut.  I say as much, because prior to Ex-Aid’s release I had a hunch that it was going to be good.  Lo and behold, I was right.  More importantly, I was right in the best way possible.  Ex-Aid had the perfect setup for the most impactful, in-depth exploration of its themes in a KR installment yet, so they just needed to pounce on the chance.  They did exactly that.

…Well, mostly.  But “mostly” is better than “not at all”.  So let’s get to it.

LET’S GAME!  MECTHA GAME!  MUTCHA GAME!  WHAT’S YOUR NAME?!

I’M A MAJOR SPOILER(S)!

RE: Kamen Rider Ex-Aid

“We Madoka now.”

I remember using that line to describe Kamen Rider Gaim a few years back, and with good reason.  For those unaware, Gaim -- a tokusatsu series carrying the Kamen Rider torch -- was spearheaded by Gen “The Butcher” Urobuchi, who by then had long since stolen the spotlight with his now-infamous magical girl anime, Puella Magi Madoka Magica.  Confession time: I haven’t seen the latter series, but I have seen the former.  And cultural osmosis has made me suspect that there are more than a few parallels between Gaim and Madoka…which I’ll spare you of here, because spoilers are involved.

Parallels or not, Gaim went on to become a fan favorite with plenty of spinoffs to its name.  I’m mostly okay with that; I like Gaim, and I can see why people would absolutely love it, but to me it’s not the be-all and end-all.  Good, but not outstanding; strong, but not without flaw.  It did give us Micchy, one of KR’s best characters (IMO), but it also gave us Kaito, one of KR’s worst characters (IMO).  My thoughts aside, it’s not hard to imagine the showrunners wanting to reproduce the success and fame that Gaim brought in -- especially as a follow-up to the less-than-stellar KR Ghost.

Enter Kamen Rider Ex-Aid -- which at a base level is “We Madoka Now: Revengeance.”  But if you cut even an inch deeper, it’s Gaim 2.0.  But if you cut two inches deeper, then you might have the same opinion I do: Ex-Aid is the bizarro-Gaim.  It’s good for the reasons that Gaim was bad…and bad for the reasons that Gaim was good.

…In my humble opinion, of course.

What Anime Should I Watch? (Also, I’m a Kamen Rider)

So a funny thing happened the other day.  See, Kamen Rider Build started airing on September 3^rd, and -- as a fan of the franchise for a good four years now -- I’ve been following its progress and details whenever I can.  I haven’t seen the first episode yet, mind you, but I’ve seen clips and read up on details.  One point in particular crossed my path: apparently, Build’s special moves (some of them at least) are called “Boltech Finish” and “Boltech Break”.  Seem familiar?  Well, depending on how you hear the sounds and read the katakana used to craft them, it can be interpreted as a B or a V.  In other words?  If you go by what TV Tropes has on the series, it’s actually a “Voltech Finish” and a “Voltech Break”.

To quote the famed nihilist philosopher Homer Simpson: “HE’S NAMED LIKE MY NAME!”

Logic would suggest that it’s just a happy coincidence (because incidentally, Voltech has also showed up in move names in Guilty Gear Xrd and Under Night In-Birth).  Of course, better logic would suggest that, because of my enduring loyalty and constant efforts as the unofficial herald of The Church of Rider Kicks, the creators from on high paid tribute to me, my humble and most undeserved self, in the best way possible.  So yeah, I'm basically a Kamen Rider now.  Just give me a belt, a mask, and a motorcycle, and I’m all set.

…

…Okay, let’s talk about anime for a bit. 

Should I go see Power Rangers?

I haven’t had an internal crisis this severe since that time I found out that “fans” of The Magic School Bus were willing to make Rule 34 art of Ms. Frizzle.  I mean, yeah, I get it.  Rule 34 is Rule 34, but…is there nothing sacred?  I guess not.  And knowing that there are people who see Ms. Frizzle as an object of lust is -- well, it’s just the sort of thing destined to shake your faith in humanity, you know?

All right, enough about that.  Let’s talk about the Power Rangers movie.  No, not that one.  Not that one.  Not that one.  That one.

Yep.  Thaaaaaaaaaaaaaaat’s the one.

Power Rangers Colon Movie Trailer Analysis for Blogging

All right, look.  Normally I wouldn’t do this sort of thing, because I’m pretty sure I’ve said in the past, in writing (or close enough to it) that I think trailers are bullshit.  They lie, they delude, they misrepresent, and more -- all for the sake of trying to strong-arm viewers into getting hyped.  And while there are some good trailers out there, too many of them nowadays aren’t.  Or maybe they’ll be great, but they’ll be much better than the actual movie/game/whatever coming up.  I’ve always thought it best to judge the actual product based on gathered information and reviews, weighted with personal inference -- and at some point, an actual, direct look at said product.

So I’m not usually one to get sucked into trailer hype.  And I’m also not the type to pour over every second or every frame to find some hidden clue that’ll “change everything”.  Honestly, just making this post feels like a dirty act; it’s like I’ve suddenly thrown away my dignity for a big dumb clickbait article (“This One Weird Trick Will Win Any Power Rangers Fan’s Heart!  Saban Hates It!”).  But as a tokusatsu fan to this day -- and beyond -- and as someone with more than a little interest in storytelling -- no matter the form -- I’m making an exception.  I feel compelled to weigh in, so I will.  Just this once.  Don’t get used to it.

Okay.  So here we go.

Ranking the Kamen Rider Seasons (Part 2)

So the other day, I asked myself a question: why do I like Kamen Rider?

Call it a crisis of faith, I guess.  It’s easy to get caught up in something and follow it out of some unspoken sense of obligation -- like you’re just going through the motions, because “I did the thing once, so I might as well do the thing again.”  I’m pretty sure I’ve typecast myself as some kind of Rider fanatic, given how many times I slip allusions, images, and even secret references into my posts.  (To say nothing of the posts actually about Kamen Rider.)  In a perfect world, people would pay more attention to that stuff instead of huddling around the campfire when I upload a post on Final Fantasy/Kingdom Hearts/the madhouse that is Squeenix.  But I digress.

Pared down to basics, I like KR because I like heroes.  And not to get maudlin or pitiable, but it’s a safe bet that I needed to see heroes in my life.  After all, it’s probably not a coincidence that I started seriously getting into the franchise in the same year -- 2013 -- that I went through some major personal losses.  Beyond that, I had to deal with the frustration of having my own works -- my writing, my dreams, and my own batch of heroes -- rejected to the point where I scrapped and rebooted years of work.  Beyond that, it seemed like fiction in the western world had basically given up on heroes.  Man of Steel turned Superman into a braindead whirlwind of destruction and angst.  The Walking Dead became a hit with a cast of survivors barely a cut above the zombies they routinely shot in the head.  I…I don’t even want to talk about DmC.

I’ll argue that the world needs heroes -- even, if not especially fictional -- but I’ll also acknowledge that that’s some top-tier projecting.  I need heroes.  KR delivered, again, and again, and again.  And that’s why I’m here today once again, as a fan, and as a spokesperson.  These are my Top 4 picks of the franchise thus far.

Ranking the Kamen Rider Seasons (Part 1)

Confession time: I was tempted to go on Twitter and make a joke about the recently-revealed Kamen Rider Ex-Aid, but decided against it.  I didn’t want to risk accidentally spoiling the new Rider’s look and/or plot details for those who actually care about spoilers.  Or Kamen Rider in general, which to be fair I’m not 100% sure any of my Twitter followers actually care about.  But hey, better safe than sorry.

Then again, I’m kinda-sorta spoiling it via this post, soooooo…safety is for yellowbellies, I guess.

I’ll be honest.  I had a pretty violent reaction to Ex-Aid’s look -- i.e. the gaudiest mix of colors combined with some design choices that make me tilt my head far enough to shatter my neck.  “Oh no.  What were they thinking?” I thought.  I couldn’t help myself.  But armed with the knowledge that Ex-Aid will have different forms -- and that the true quality of the season will come from the story and action -- I’m at peace with it.  I’ll give it a fair shake when the time comes.  Until then, though?  I think it’s about time I do something personal.

I’ve seen more than my fair share of Kamen Rider over the years.  And after putting some thought into it, I’ve decided to sort each season into a list -- so without further ado, here’s my take on The Top 8 3/5^ths Kamen Rider Seasons.  Because, well, that’s as far as I’ve gotten so far.  And now that there’s a fraction in there, you know you’re in for a good time.

Eyes Open! It’s VR!

I consider it a point of pride to know as much as I do about games.  I’m no walking encyclopedia, but I still get around -- though there are still some pretty big gaps I’ve yet to reconcile.  Case in point: I first heard about the Oculus Rift from an old episode of Game Grumps, but never felt compelled to do any reading about it.  Sure, Facebook ended up going in all guns blazing with the then-upcoming VR headset, but it seemed to me that the House of Zuckerburg blew a ton of money on technology we aren’t even sure will last -- or how to work it, for that matter.

To be clear, I’ve never had anything against VR.  But I never had a vested interest in it, or unflinching faith in its potential.  I wanted to wait until there were tons of concrete details to go by, and more importantly, I wanted to see actual games instead of mere tech demos.  Imagine my surprise, then, when I actually got to try out one of the VR headsets.  And boy was it something.

But I’m going to take the high road and not make references to VR Troopers, because everyone else is doing that already.  I’m sure I’ll find something to compensate with -- and I promise it’ll be 100% relevant to the post’s context.

The Last of Us -- feat. Kamen Rider OOO (Part 2)

Confession time: I’ve been reluctant to make this post, and the one before it.

It’s not that I mind expressing my opinions, since I at least try to rationalize what I type out.  But things can get pretty volatile when it comes to games, especially stuff like The Last of Us.  Just look at the comments at the end of this feature -- the vitriol could melt a steel wall.  It’s one thing to disagree with someone’s opinion (and his/her personal takeaway from a game, one that tries its best to inspire thought and discourse), but it’s another to shut it down while barely trying to make a counter-argument.

Imagine how I feel in my aims to avoid rocking the boat, but to be so daring, so mad, and so audacious as to claim that an underpants-loving goof from a merchandise-driven franchise is somehow better than the weathered survivalist from 2013’s critical darling and fan favorite.  I’m a little wary, to say the least.  But I’m serious here.  Kamen Rider OOO’s Eiji is, in my eyes, a better character than Joel.  And I’d even go so far as to say that his story in general is better, too.  Yes, yes, different mediums, different objectives, etc. -- but speaking personally?  One of those characters makes me deliberate (and smile) to this day, even after experiencing his story to completion more than a year ago.  The other is Joel Grumpybuns.  So all aboard the crazy train once more, yes?

Watch Dogs (feat. Kamen Rider W)

Let me say this to start: this post is, at a bare minimum, eight months old.

Like, I’d written pretty much everything a while back.  But for one reason or another, other posts took priority.  I’d blame a single game for it, but I think for now I’ll just take the high ground and point fingers at the better part of reality itself.  So at some point I just decided to have it go up on a certain date.

“Hey, you know what?” I asked myself.  “You’re coming up on the one-year anniversary of your very first post on Watch Dogs, AKA the game you consider the worst western-developed game you’ve ever played.  Why not celebrate sheer mediocrity and unacceptably-poor design by offsetting it with your not-at-all-secret Kamen Rider propagandist agenda?”

So here we are.  And here we shall be, until the world knows just how miserable of a game Watch Dogs is -- and that we must never forget what Ubisoft hath wrought.  But on the plus side?  Guys in big dumb monster suits.  And armored suits.  Just suits all over the damn place.

Let's discuss Kamen Rider Gaim (Part 3).

(Cross-Up is on hiatus, sort of, but not really!  I’m going to try and take it easy over the next few weeks, because it’s the winter holiday season and I half-expect nobody to be around on the internet.  Things will get back in gear sometime in January, but until then?  If you ARE here, then enjoy a handful of high-quality filler posts.  It’ll be fun, presumably!)

Like I’ve said before, Gaim has been on my mind for a good while now -- even before I started working on these posts.  It’s not even close to my favorite Kamen Rider installment (that honor goes to OOO, the first one I watched to completion), but if things had gone differently Gaim would have taken the top spot.  And I’m all right with that; part of the reason I check out other KR installments is because I’m waiting for the series that boots OOO from the throne -- the one show that lets me say “I don’t just like OOO because it was my first.” 

That’ll happen eventually, I hope.  But it hasn’t yet.  That’s not to devalue Gaim, because even if I can point to problems I had with it -- and let’s be real, there ARE problems -- I can still enjoy it as a whole.  There are just things that any given viewer needs to consider.

And the one thing I kept considering from the show’s start to its finish is this: We Madoka now.

Let me say this to start:

I am fairly filling this post with SPOILERS!  So…you know, be wary of those.  It’ll help you in the long run, I imagine.

…

…DENEB!

Let’s discuss Kamen Rider Gaim (Part 2).

(Cross-Up is on hiatus, sort of, but not really!  I’m going to try and take it easy over the next few weeks, because it’s the winter holiday season and I half-expect nobody to be around on the internet.  Things will get back in gear sometime in January, but until then?  If you ARE here, then enjoy a handful of high-quality filler posts.  It’ll be fun, presumably!)

Before I get started, let’s play a game. 

I want you to think of a villain -- your favorite villain, from any story, from any medium, from any time.  Take as much time as you need before going on.  Then, once you have that villain in mind, think for a minute about why that villain means so much to you.  (In the event that the villain is more of a concept/conflict than someone the hero can punch in the face, substitute that instead.)  Don’t worry about forcing yourself to articulate it, or even mentioning it here in a comment.  Just keep your answers fresh on your mind, okay?

Good.  Great.  Remember those answers, because I’m going to come back to them later.  But for now?  Open your eyes for the next Faiz.

…Crap, wrong Rider.

My SPOILERS will make you cry.

Wipe your tears with this.  *tosses printed copy of the last two Gaim posts*

…That is also the wrong Rider.  Man, I’m really bad at this.

Kamen Rider Gaim: A Super Holiday Suplex Post

(Cross-Up is on hiatus, sort of, but not really!  I’m going to try and take it easy over the next few weeks, because it’s the winter holiday season and I half-expect nobody to be around on the internet.  Things will get back in gear sometime in January, but until then?  If you ARE here, then enjoy a handful of high-quality filler posts.  It’ll be fun, presumably!)

Oh man, please tell me I’m the first person on the internet to make this joke.  It would make me so very, very happy.

Well, if nothing else, I’m the first person to ever make the joke on this blog.  THAT MEANS I’VE WON!

All right, I’m about to unload a fruit basket’s worth of SPOILERS on you guys, so if you want a no-spoiler version of what I think about this show (and by extension, a trim primer on Gaim), then you’d better go read this post instead…or first.  Or you can read this one if you have no interest in ever watching it.

That would kind of make this post a moot point -- if not for the stuff I’m about to discuss.  Are you ready?  Here we gooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!

RE: Kamen Rider Gaim

(Cross-Up ison hiatus, sort of, but not really!  I’m going to try and take it easy over the next few weeks, because it’s the winter holiday season and I half-expect nobody to be around on the internet.  Things will get back in gear sometime in January, but until then?  If you ARE here, then enjoy a handful of high-quality filler posts.  It’ll be fun, presumably!)

I don’t do this very often -- or at all -- but I’m going to have to put a little strain on the rules.

What I post here tends to NOT be a straight-up review -- of TV shows, games, movies, or anything that pops up.  I’m more concerned with determining why something is good or bad instead of just outright saying “this is good” or “this is bad”.  There’s some overlap, sure, but as I’ve said in the past, this isn’t the place to go if you’re looking for a score on the latest game, or any sort of ranking system.

That in mind, I have to make an exception just this once for Kamen Rider Gaim.  Two reasons for that: first, I’d vastly prefer talking about it if I can point someone toward watching it -- but seeing as how that’d demand a fifty-ish episode marathon run, I think it’d be best if I at least put the suggestion in a reader’s head.  More importantly, Gaim is the sort of show that’s hard to talk about without tripping all over spoilers -- SO, I’m going to use THIS post as a sort of all-purpose primer.  It’ll superficially tell you what’s good and what isn’t (even if that means hinting towards spoilers); in the posts to follow, we’ll go into full-on discussion mode so I can talk about the good and the bad.  Watching Gaim in its entirety won’t be required, though, so you can rest easy.  Just read what I’ve got so you can walk away with a fresh perspective.

Okay?  Okay.  Let’s get started then.  First…