The Smash Ultimate Diaries -- ACT I

You know, I had a feeling this would happen.

Don’t misunderstand right off the bat; it’s not as if I’m about to say “Super Smash Bros. Ultimate is a huge disappointment.”  On the contrary.  I think it’s a good game, and here’s why: just as I predicted, there have been multiple instances since release day on December 7^th (6^th if you’re like me and had the digital version pre-loaded alongside geographical advantages) when I had to make a call.  Play more Smash, or get more sleep?

I’ve chosen Smash over sleep on more than one occasion.  I probably shouldn’t.  I mean, as of writing I feel a cold coming on, and it wasn’t long ago that I went to bed early because I felt like throwing up.  I didn’t, thankfully -- I need to work on rebuilding my streak of going over a decade without puking -- but the worst part about it wasn’t that I felt like my insides sparked a bloody revolution.  It was that I missed out on valuable Smash time.

Right now, all I want to do is play it more.  But in the interest of keeping this blog alive, let’s go ahead and have a random collection of thoughts.  Then more smashing.

Just Another Hero (AKA Hiatus Time)

Now, I’m not saying that My Hero Academia is the best shonen manga/anime in the history of the genre and demographic -- or if not that, then at least in recent years -- buuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuut…

…

…I can’t think of a non-incriminating way to finish that sentence.  So I’ll just embed a clip of All Might and leave it at that.

Let’s discuss The MISSING: J.J. Macfield and the Island of Memories.

It doesn’t take much for me to point out the biggest fault in The MISSING: that at the end of the day, it’s let down by the quality of its gameplay.

That isn’t to say it’s an all-out failure.  Everything works as intended in this puzzle-platformer -- spearheaded by Hidetaka Suehiro (Swery65) of Deadly Premonition and D4 fame -- so you can expect some challenges that demand you make full use of the mechanics.  Minor technical hiccups aside, it’s smooth sailing from start to finish.  Relatively speaking.  The problem is that, while the gameplay isn’t bad or even mediocre, it’s still fairly plain and straightforward.  Workmanlike, even.  

There aren’t really any puzzles that force you to wrack your brain, and there’s not much of a difficulty curve forcing you to sharpen your wits or skills as you go.  At most, you’ll only get platforming challenges along the way -- which, at their worst, are only challenging because you’re put into scenarios where one-hit KOs are a legitimate, prevalent issue.  Basically, don’t get this game if you’re the type that needs technical acuity or execution barriers in your games.  Dark Souls, this is not.

Instead, get it for everything else.

ALL THE SPOILERS INCOMING…which kind of makes this post impossible to read for those who want to go in raw, but whatever.  If you’re worried, just…I dunno, go eat some donuts instead.  I bet Swery would be fine with that.

Go play The MISSING. (Also, writing junk.)

Now, I don’t want to oversell the game, but let me say this about The MISSING: J.J. Macfield and the Island of Memories. Its greatest sin is that it released in the same year and quarter as Super Smash Bros. Ultimate -- because if it chose any other time period, then it would probably, if not easily, be my Game of the Year.

I mean, it’s not perfect.  There are some technical issues (on the Switch, at least), a decent chunk of the puzzles are surprisingly basic (except for one at the end involving a big shoe), the voice acting occasionally reaches a point where main heroine JJ is channeling the spirit of Tommy Wiseau, and…yeah, I can see the general length of the game -- or lack thereof -- being a sticking point for gamers that want bang for their buck.  Then again, my $30 got me about 8 hours of entertainment, so your mileage may vary.  Also this is both a complaint and a compliment: this game really pops off in the final act or so, meaning that the ending is…yikesy mikesy.

I’ll probably talk more about the game another day, but for now?  Buy it, watch an LP, read up on it, consume it however you can.  Now let’s spend the rest of this post talking about big dumb writing projects.

Sideswiped by Politics (Part 2)

So I had a moment the night before I went to vote.

Final Fantasy: All the Bumblers

Hmm.  Let’s see.  I could do another relevant, incisive, and heartfelt post on politics.  Or, alternatively, I could dump all over a franchise that’s way too easy to make fun of, yet draws my eye and ire every time because of a worthless vendetta I have against one of gaming’s most beloved brands.

Hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm.  Tough choice.

Hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm.

Oh, wait.  It’s not a tough choice at all.  Gather around, children, for today is a glorious day.  Come, take a seat around the campfire as Grandpappy Voltech blathers on about Final Fantasy.  Again.  Because it’s what you crave, presumably.

Re: RE: Super Smash Bros. Ultimate

How to become a Game of the Year 2018 contender instantly -- irrespective of actual game quality or even a full release -- as explained by Super Smash Bros. Ultimate.

Step One: KILL EVERYONE YOU LOVE.

That’s…pretty much the only step.

Sideswiped by Politics (Part 1)

Is Smash Bros. Ultimate out yet?

No?

*sigh* Fine.  Let’s talk about politics some more.

Let’s discuss…nah, let’s GO VOTE.

I mean, technically I already got my vote in (based early voting), but it builds a sense of rapport if I say “let’s go vote”.

RE: The MISSING: J.J. Macfield and the Island of Memories

The MISSING: J.J. Macfield and the Island of Memories ranks as one of the most spiteful purchases I’ve ever made.

Granted, I’d been leaning toward a purchase for a good while.  Some strong reviews and recommendations offered a push, and when I started watching video footage -- only to shut it off for fear of spoilers, a rarity for me -- I knew I had to get it eventually.  Sooner rather than later.  The big boot came from Call of Duty, of all things.  As someone who’s sworn off the franchise (after doing my time, lest you think I’m a hypocrite), I’m still more than a little butthurt over the fact that the latest installment has made a huge amount of money again.

So consider this impulse/non-impulse buy a middle finger to the lurching behemoth on the horizon.  Fortunately, I lucked out with my one-fingered salute -- because even without the smugness brimming from my one-man protest, the game’s pretty good.