So a while back, I (finally) started playing The Witcher 3 -- and believe it or not,
I actually like it. I like the
exploration, I like the combat, I suspect I have the potential to develop a
Gwent addiction, and I even like Geralt.
Because even if his gravelly voice says otherwise, he’s not your
standard tough guy antihero; seriously, you have no idea how much it means to
me to have a character who shows a full range of emotions. You will never
But even if I like Geralt, I have to admit I like
Yennefer more. She’s just plain cooler
-- a witch with some serious magical chops, for sure, but there’s more to her
than that. She’s got the smarts, the
sass, and underneath her bluster she’s someone that actually cares about
things. I admit I don’t know the full
extent of her relationship with Geralt, but at least I know firsthand that
there is a relationship. It means something to them, and by proxy it
means something to me. It should go
without saying, but I wish I could stop playing as a witcher so I could go full
blast with a straight-up witch.
And that got me thinking -- which is my M.O., of
course, but whatever. No time for
I used to watch wrestling a lot more than I do
nowadays. Smackdown aired on basic cable, so I could flip it on and watch
some body slams and muscular men getting uncomfortably close together (as if
they wanted to kiss each other); I remember there was one fight between Rey
Mysterio and Batista that was more or less amazing. But when it hopped channels, I didn’t have
the will to chase after it -- and I never really watched RAW in the first
place, so I was out. And the last
wrestling game I played was Smackdown vs.
Raw 2010 (I think), which was pretty fun IMO…but my brother decided to
trade it in just ‘cause. Either that, or he hated spending most
matches unconscious and flat on his face.
I don’t know a
lot about wrestling, but I know some
stuff. I know who John Cena is, and not
just because of his
sudden memetic uprising. And it’s my
understanding that, as of the last Wrestlemania (at the very least) he’s the
WWE’s face. He’s its hero. He’s someone they’ve been pushing as a good
guy, even if that’s with the grace of a cinder block to the gut. But even if he and the WWE are way over the
top, I have a hard time ignoring the motto of “Loyalty, Hustle, Respect” --
especially in the face of Devil May Cry 4. Because the more I think about it, the more I
realize that’s part of what makes the game great. What do I mean? Well --
I played WWE All-Stars,
too. Man, what a sick game.
You know, I’m a little bummed out that the phrase “lickety-split”
has fallen by the wayside. Someone needs
to bring that back. I’d say that I’d do
it, but I’m lobbying for greater circulation of my quasi-catch phrase of “yikesy
All right, that’s enough irreverence. Let’s do this fast.
You know, I’ve never thought of myself as a
I’m pretty easygoing -- if not apathetic -- when
it comes to the big subjects. Politics,
religion, stuff like that -- it doesn’t really make me hot under the collar, so
it’s not as if I’m going to get into a screaming match with someone with a
different opinion from me. Really, the
only thing I try and campaign for is better fiction. We want more, and we deserve more -- but we need the wits and savvy to understand
what makes stories good in the first place.
I’m not asking for much, I hope.
But these days?
It feels like I’m campaigning and crusading against nostalgia-bait
products more than anything else.
(Relatively speaking, given my tirades against grim and gritty fare…and
before that, nearly everything Squeenix has put out semi-recently.) People deserve good stories, and no matter
the opinion on Joe Plumbers or sheeple or lowest common denominators, I’d like
to think that when offered a genuinely good
story, they’ll know what they’ve always wanted.
What they -- and we -- don’t need are retreads of the past, again and
again and again. We need something
new. Something different. Something that at least has the potential to
So why is it that I’ve been having more fun with
stuff from the past?