The 400th Post: And So it Begins...

Spirit Showdown -- Round 4 Recap

 And here we are.  Three more posts are uploaded and set, and once again, it’s time for a short reprieve while I massage my sore fingers.  (I’m noticing that I have a weird way of italicizing things; I bend my left thumb really far back to reach the CTRL key.)  But enough about my hands; I’ve never even entertained the thought of becoming a hand model, and I’m not about to start now.  There’s writing to be done, and a battle to be won…in more ways than one.

Insert your own joke about rhyming here.  Preferably one featuring hot dogs in some capacity.

Spirit Showdown #10: The Biker

>tier-two summoning completed

>transporting data packets

>analyzing boundary

>analyzing tri-existence quotient

>analyzing

>pondering

>wondering

>thinking

>hoping

Spirit Showdown α: The Prince

“Look, I don’t see what you’re so mad about.  Coyote-boy gave us an out, and we got it.  So how about you give the raging a rest?  You’re gonna give yourself wrinkles -- and I don’t think you can afford to look any worse than you already do.”

Beat drove a foot through the virtual platform, digging up a splash of pixels and numbers.  “Well, yeah, but -- wait, what was that about my looks?”

“What?  I didn’t say a word…”  Tony glanced aside, his usual scowl tightening even further.  “Lousy sasquatch wife,” he muttered.

“I’m just gonna pretend I didn’t hear anything, because that’s the only way your head won’t get smacked right off your neck.”  She folded her arms and groaned, standing her ground in a most-unladylike stance.  “It’s just that that guy -- FX or whatever -- he just pisses me off so much!”

“What doesn’t?”

“Unicorns and rainbows.  Obviously.”  Beat looked around a bit, taking note of the orange-rimmed platforms and tessellated cubes drifting through the air around them.  “So what’re we supposed to do now?”

“Hell if I know.  The way I see it, though, coyote-boy gave us an out so we could go do something.”

“So what, you’re saying that he’s on our side after all?”

“Maybe.  More on our side than blob-boy back there.”

“So he pretty much sacrificed himself to save us?  And with his dying breath, he wants us to put together the pieces to beat that sack of black pixelly gooey bits and save the world, right?”

“Probably…but I’m about ready to blow him off.”

“Wow!  You’re a terrible person!”

Tony looked back at her over his shoulder.  “Good.  You know how I work.”  He went back to his business, crouching low to the ground and running his hands about.  “Crap.  I bet I know how this works; we don’t get to leave until we do something…”  His beady eyes rolled around in his head.  “Heroic.  God, why me?  I just wanted my vacation…”

“Hey, Tony?”

“What?  Can’t you hear me lamenting my life?”

Beat scratched at her temple.  “Is it just me, or does something feel…different?”

“Yeah, it does.  Now gimme a hand here; if we have to dig our way out, it’d be good to have an extra set of hands.”

DmC: A Pre-Discussion

DmC: Devil May Cry is automatically inferior to the other Devil May Cry games, and here’s why: in 2005’s highly-acclaimed, highly-beloved Devil May Cry 3, after defeating a vampiric demoness Dante takes her power as his own, unlocking the Nevan for combat.  Said weapon is a demonic electric guitar that shoots vampire bats and lightning, creates explosive shockwaves with power chords, summons columns of sparks and bats with a fleet-fingered solo, and can shift into a scythe for rapid-swinging combos.  To say nothing of the fact that this is what happens when you first get it.

My brother swears up and down that the Nevan is the worst weapon in the game, but damn it if it’s not the most stylish and crazy -- and in a sense, captures the essence of both DMC3 and the series in general.  The 2013 reboot, DmC, does not.  It doesn’t have that stylish crazy action.  It doesn’t have the trappings of the series, both good and bad.  It doesn’t have the spirit, choosing to substitute its own.

Does that make it inherently bad?  No.  If the game can offer something substantial to latch on to, it doesn’t matter as much (if at all) if it’s something of a sideways evolution; that is, rather than continuing upwards from a certain path, it takes a step to the right and becomes something different.  Potentially, something better.  Something that can prove its merits as a reboot and that the end product has been in competent hands this whole time.  And given reviews, that seems to be the case.  High marks abound across the board; the lowest score I’ve seen is a three out of five. 

So if you’re here expecting me to say “This game is terrible!” then you’re out of luck.  I can’t say it.  I won’t say it.  Saying that means that DmC is objectively awful -- a broken mess of a game that has the risk of melting consoles with incompetence and general badness.  It means that every reviewer who likes the game is wrong.  So no, I won’t say that the game is terrible.

What I can say, however, is that I think the game is terrible.

Spirit Showdown μ: The Nobody

>breaching boundary

>accessing terminal

>uploading post number 266

>preparing tier-two summoning procedure

>link established

>beginning upload

>executing reality preservation protocol

>calculating tri-existence quotient

Spirit Showdown -- Round 3 Recap

So here we are again, with another set of heroes revealed.  How fitting is it that the New Year would start off with a pair of characters who are just barely qualified to be heroes?  Oh well; in their universe, they’re the best the world has got.  Though you could pretty much apply that to every character introduced so far, but that’s neither here nor there.

In any case, I’ll hold off on posting a summarizing video, mostly because the “full set” hasn’t been revealed yet.  It’ll come next time, but for now you can either read the posts for Alice, Raze, and Tony/Beat -- or you could do the more natural thing and wait for the highly-condensed version in about a month.

The reason, obviously, is that I promised ten characters -- and that’s precisely what you’ll get.  So I’d rather not make a video now (which with my limited tool set takes much longer than I’d prefer), only to make another video for one character.  It seems wasteful, is all I’m saying.  But in addition, there’s also the story arc that I’ve been developing for quite a while -- the one in which I (or at least my virtual stand-in) actually die.  So for the sake of providing a refresher, I'll give you a quick summary.

Spirit Showdown #9: The Lovers

>breaching boundary

>accessing terminal

>uploading post number 256

>initiating summoning procedure

>summoning complete

>initiating spirit protocol

Spirit Showdown #8: The Soldier

“Hey, it’s your favorite band!”

My brother Rich recoiled at the sound of Linkin Park bursting through the speakers of his car.  It’s a running gag between us to say “it’s your favorite _____” when something either of us revile  or don’t care about shows up, like when I’d hold up the Wii installment of Deadliest Catch during a GameStop run and say “Hey, it’s your favorite game!”  But the mere mention -- the mere thought -- of Linkin Park made him positively livid.  Why, I couldn’t begin to guess.

Of course, he was quick to explain.  “Everyone’s allowed to like one shitty band when you’re young,” he said.  “I remember back when I was taking bass guitar lessons, my teacher told me to bring in a song to play.  So I brought in Linkin Park, and he was just like, ‘Ughhhhhhhh.  All right, let’s get this crap over with.’  I mean, they’ve gotta have the worst bassist ever.”

Not being a guitarist, I wasn’t about to debate with him.  All I knew was that at one point, he liked Linkin Park -- to the point where, when I’d come home from school, it wasn’t uncommon for me to hear him blasting some of their tracks.  Whether that was just to hone his skills or just because he loved hearing their music remains a mystery…though I suspect his discovery of the band was helped by stumbling upon a Dragon Ball Z AMV set to “Forgotten.” 

It goes without saying that, by virtue of audio-osmosis, I ended up liking Linkin Park for a while as well (it certainly helps that Rich left one of their CDs in my CD player after an extended borrowing period).  While those days have long since passed and I’ve moved on to some better stuff since then -- metal in particular -- there was a time when their music had a real effect on me.  Not the “CRAWLING IN MY SKIN” sort of affect, of course, but just enough to shape me just a tiny bit.  To change my perspective, outlook, and of course, creative processes.

So if not for Linkin Park, this next character likely wouldn’t exist.  And if not for the years that followed, and all the music therein, this next character wouldn’t be who he is today: quite possibly my favorite of them all.

Spirit Showdown #7: The Agent

Killer7 is a weird game.  I just want to make that clear.

It’s as much a rail shooter as it is an adventure game, fusing Resident Evil’s item-collecting sensibilities with the pinpoint-striking gunplay of any given light gun arcade game.  If that were it, then I’d be fine with calling it innovative and leaving it at that -- but in case you haven’t heard, Killer7 is a game where you shoot mutated, explosive, laughing suicide bombers in their weak points to absorb their essence.  You play as eight characters, seven of which are more or less rolled into one body and you switch between them as needed.  There’s a conspiracy involving an afro-haired TV personality with a cardboard office in Texas, a pastiche of the Power Rangers that’s come to life and kills their creator, and a plot partially orchestrated by two Japanese politicians who shoot brain matter at you after having their heads blown open, and the only way to beat them is to shoot at one of their ties.  Oh, and a harvester of the bodies of orphans who has an anime schoolgirl daughter with eyes the size of sand dollars, submachine guns, and super-speed. 

I’m pretty sure that the developers -- Suda51 well among them -- made it up as they went along as part of their drug-fueled fever dream; I dare not imagine the man who could come up with the final hours of that game while in a normal state of mind.  But what’s important to take away from Killer7 isn’t that it leaves you saying “Wow!  What a delightfully weird-ass game!”  What’s important is that it leaves you saying “Wow!  What an imaginative game!”  That’s probably why I admire Japanese games as much as I do: they don’t give a damn if you don’t understand them in the long run.  They’re just out to act on their creative vision -- act without limits, just as any good story can and should.

And with that in mind, here we are.  A story, and a heroine, that likely wouldn’t exist without the reckless imagination of Killer7.

Hope you’re ready.  The first member of the “Tech Trio” is here.

Spirit Showdown -- Round 2 Recap

Hey guys, what’s up?  I’m guessing that a bunch of you are getting into the holiday spirit (or lamenting its mere existence and the contaminating effect it has on society and media at large).  And what better way to celebrate the season than with a much-needed update on the Spirit Showdown?

Now, don’t flay me with your trusted javelins just yet.  I’ve been cooking up some new stuff on the Showdown front, and if you’ve been keeping up you may have noticed it.  There’s a story arc a-brewing within the confines of that segment, and if things go as they have so far, the entire world -- and worse yet, the internet -- is facing a complete meltdown!  What’s a blogger to do?  You can bet I’ll have my hands full trying to figure out an answer, but time’s running out…and characters that I once considered allies may turn out to be the most dangerous of all!  Breathless gasp!

So yeah, if the original character (DO NOT STEAL!) angle isn’t doing it for you, rest assured that there IS something bigger going on in the long run, and if I can summon up the proper skills, I can give it a hopefully-satisfying conclusion.  That aside, I’ve prepared another four-minute recap to bring any newcomers up to speed on the “Speed Trio”.  Observe:

And of course, the recap on the “Power Trio” is still up and ready for viewing.  You can pop over there at your leisure and see that video if need be.  Alternatively, you can read the in-depth stuff on Cobalt, Shino, and FX whenever you’re ready -- or just place your votes at the bottom of this post, or once it appears on the sidebar in a day or two.

That aside, I want to take steps here and now -- while there’s a slight reprieve -- to open things up for at least SOME form of discussion.  As I said when I started this thing, I’m not just doing this to show off my super-duper characters or my so-so at best art.  This is a way to get people thinking about what they can do and want to do with their own work…or at least think about the things they like in a new light.  A good story, in my opinion, has a strong and definable spirit -- an essence, or an array of ideas and proofs that helps to give a story a genuine and unique feeling.  I think it’s something that is pretty easy to point out, when you think about it; to paraphrase Mr. Plinkett of Red Letter Media, “You may not have noticed, but your brain did.”  So I’ll go ahead and leave a question for you visitors to my virtual space:

What’s your spirit?

I would assume that there are a handful of would-be writing heroes who have my blog on virtual speed dial, so if you’re one of them (or have inexplicably come here by virtue of searches for sauerkraut), then tell all.  If you’ve got a story in mind, talk about its essence.  What makes it tick?  What makes it special?  What makes it your own, and your best?

And for you gamer-types, don’t think you’re off the hook either.  Even if you’re not actively writing a story, you still have easy access to tens, hundreds, or even thousands of them across at least a half dozen mediums.  So in your case, I’ll ask you this:

What kind of spirit gets you excited?

I’ve made my distaste for gritty stories known, but maybe that works for you.  Maybe there’s something you see in them that I don’t -- not just aesthetic and tonal choices, but the one-word essence that sums up everything that makes the tale what it is (I’d argue that the spirit of Looper, for example, is “selfishness”).  Basically, you can gab on about why you like the things you like; if you’re anything like me, writing about what you enjoy will give you a better perspective and appreciation of it.  Or just make you hate it more than the limits of human emotion and decency can allow.  Could go either way, really.

In any case, the stage is set.  There are six characters up, and four more to go.  The story arc is starting to motor.  Soon enough, the Hero of Heroes will be crowned.  But we’ve still got a ways to go before we reach that point.

In the meantime…

And that’ll do it for now.  See you guys around.

The Showdown's moving at a steady pace. Who's your favorite so far?

Spirit Showdown #6: The Convict

Hey, have you ever heard of that anime Kikaider?

Well, I suppose technically it should be that franchise Kikaider; as I understand it, there was a live-action version that predated the anime by a few decades.  But I know the anime -- few episodes that there were -- best, thanks to its Adult Swim run.  I liked the show; in fact, I liked it so much that I thought, “Hey, what if I made a story like that?”  And it didn’t take long for a story to start taking

[SYSTEM ERROR]

form.  And by “form” I mean pretty much a carbon copy.  Only instead of a grim and introspective yet gentle fighting machine, it featured a grim and introspective yet gentle fighting fox-boy.  And instead of fighting furious robots, my guy would fight furious mutated animals.  And of course, it wouldn’t have been a story without that much-adored “I have amnesia that obscures incredibly vital details” angle.  And he would be such a deeply-disturbed and fragile little flower; hell, the

[SYSTEM ERROR]

plan was to actually call the story “Altered Soul.”  Consider yourselves fortunate that it was just a phase, and that the story never got too far past the concept and initial planning; call it an evolutionary dead-end.  That story has long since been buried, and the characters therein have either been erased or transformed into entirely new entities with entirely new personalities.  Is it better now?  I think so, most definitely.  Is it good now?  Theoretically, I think it stands a chance.  Do I like it more this way?  Well, I have to say

[WARNING: FATAL SYSTEM ERROR.  FATAL SYSTEM ERROR.  ENTROPY LEVELS CRITICAL.  BOUNDARY STABILITY AT HIGH RISK.] 

Uh…do what now?

[DISTORTION IMMINENT.  DISTORTION IMMINENT.  REALITY FACING MELTDOWN.]

Okay, now THAT I understood.  So what do I do about it?

[REALITY MELTDOWN INCOMING.  ESTIMATED TIME UNTIL UNIVERSAL COLLAPSE: ELEVEN SECONDS.]

Oh, you’ve gotta be…!  I haven’t even started on my bucket list!

[ESTIMATED TIME UNTIL UNIVERSAL COLLAPSE…well, who’s to say, really?  It could happen today, tomorrow, or even yesterday.  Don’t you just love how unpredictable the fabric of reality can be?

Oh nuts.  It’s that time again, isn’t it?

Spirit Showdown #5: The Hunter

“I've got a story idea for you.”

I turned toward my brother, barely able to hide the disdain on my face.  “Another one?  What happened to your last idea?  You know, the one that was pretty much Cowboy Bebop?”

“Forget that one.  I’ve got a new idea.”  He folded his arms and smirked, nodding to himself at the thought of his idea’s inherent brilliance (as he often did).  “Okay.  So there are these guys…with cybernetic implants…and they’re all bounty hunters…and…”

I tilted my head.  “You sure love pushing that cybernetic implant angle, don’t you?”  I turned back to the computer screen.  “And I’m pretty sure you’ve already pitched this idea before.  Something about cyber ninjas, or assassins, or whatever.”

“It’s a good idea!  You should write that -- forget about all your other stories and write that one!”

I shook my head.  “I’ll tell you what.  If you can give me a better pitch -- one that’s fully thought out, doesn’t just copy Cowboy Bebop or Outlaw Star or any other anime, and DOESN’T have cyber-ninjas -- then I’ll think about it.  But you’ve gotta put in a little work. Give me something to work with.”

“Oh yeah, I’ll give you something good!”  And to this day, I await that “something good.”

To say that my brother and I have divergent tastes is like saying maple syrup is different from wet cement.  We tend to have clashing worldviews, as expected of two brothers; he’s the cynic to my optimist, the pride to my self-deprecation, the Ken to my Ryu (quite literally, across a number of fighting games).  But the one point that we’ve never seen eye-to-eye on is the concept of ninjas.  He’s always been a fan of them, proclaiming that they’re the ultimate badass warriors; I’ve always put more stock in the samurai, and I’ve gone on record explaining why I have such a strong distaste for ninjas in fiction.  And of course, he’s tried dipping his hands into my stories -- trying to make them nastier, more mature tales full of sword-swinging spectacle, without understanding what made the stories he likes (or stories in general) work.  I assume he’s gotten wiser in the years since his pitches…but then I remember that he bought Resident Evil 6 at full price, and I’m filled with near-lethal amounts of shame and apprehension.

But you know what, bro?  You finally got your wish.  You wanted cyber-ninjas?  Then for once, I’ll indulge you. 

Spirit Showdown #4: The Hoodlum

And here we are at the fourth installment.

I find it kind of funny that this next guy would pop up in an instance like this.  I’ve mentioned before that four is my “lucky” number (though “coincidental” would probably be the better description).  It’s certainly my favorite number, in spite of -- or maybe because of -- the death-infused connotations that come alongside it.  Whatever the case, it’s a cool number, and certainly meets my qualifications of being able to tell odd numbers to piss off.

What I find interesting is that on this, the fourth post, there’s going to be a marked change in a number of ways.  The last three heroes focused on the “Power Trio” -- characters that belong to (theoretically) simple stories, and make their way through them with strong offenses.  The next three belong to the “Speed Trio” -- their abilities are centered on skill and maneuverability.  More importantly, their stories aren’t quite as squeaky-clean as the last three; we’re starting to slide into some “shades of gray” territory here.  And who better to kick off the transition than this guy -- someone who’s done such a massive flip-flop in character that he might as well be a different character?  With character?

You might want to have your inhaler ready, people.  It’s about to get friggin’ weird.

Spirit Showdown -- Round 1 Recap

How’s it going, everyone?  Hope you’re all having a merry Halloween -- perhaps you’ve got your routes for the night all planned out to optimize both your candy runs and late-night shenanigans…?  And I’m willing to bet that a few of you out there has a costume so elaborate Lady Gaga would look like a gruel-munching pauper.

In any case, I thought I’d take a week to do something a little different with the much-adored(?) Spirit Showdown here on Cross-Up.  I remember a certain someone suggesting that each post in the series would likely only be about two thousand words.  Imagine my surprise, then, when one of the posts reaches the seven thousand mark.  Even for me, that’s a little excessive, especially considering that this is arguably a vanity project -- a chance to go “Look at me, I’m GIFTED!” and try to argue towards that point.  It’s something that I want to do, because I feel as if I can offer something meaningful in spite of the project’s nature.   But on the other hand, it’s something that I don’t want to do, because it IS ultimately just a bit of grandstanding.

That said, I’m leaning more toward the “want to do it” camp, because…well, I think it’s fun, and I hope that through my little profiles and explanations, I’m offering something that’s fun for you readers, as well as something educational, and most of all inspiring.  I strive to get others to take action, or at the very least think about things they wouldn’t have before, or perhaps in a new light.  If the Spirit Showdown can do that, then I’ll keep it going.

That said, I want to try to make this a bit more reader-friendly -- something that’ll benefit both parties with greater ease.  The other three posts are going to stay there (and the basic format will continue as-is), but right now I’m going to make it so that you don’t have to commit an entire afternoon to read what I have so far…unless you want to.  That’s cool.

So here’s a quick recap -- a five-minute abridged version of everything so far...with a song!

And of course, you can check out each character’s page in-depth here, here, and here.  Swordsmen, she-beasts, and superheroes, oh my!

It’s also worth noting that in terms of popularity, currently Ursa has a slight edge over the competition, with Ocelot V in second place and Deias in third.  Surprising results, in my eyes…though maybe I shouldn’t be surprised, given that one of those characters has some extra equipment to give her some extra leverage.  I never would have guessed that people would respond so positively to women with horns.

In any case, I figure I might as well reiterate the rules of the Showdown.  Remember, the idea here isn’t just to show off; it’s to promote discussion and reactions.  Comments are not only welcome, but encouraged -- because the person who comments the most smartly and aggressively will be the one to earn special bonuses, courtesy of Cross-Up.  And even with that tantalizing(?) bonus aside, this is a great chance for you to cast your vote, and take your favorite hero one step closer to becoming the “Hero of Heroes.” 

And speaking of heroes, here comes another one now.  How fast!

All right then.  I’m about ready to bail out of here for now -- but before I do, I’ll start a preliminary vote.  Cast your hat into the ring, and vote for your favorite thus far.  One press of a button is all it takes to decide where your loyalties lie -- so if ever you felt undying love and affection for a handful of concepts given (digital) form, this is it.

That’ll do it for now.  See you guys around -- and make sure you get lots of Pixie Sticks in your goodies bags. 

Next: Gotta go fast.

All right, the Spirit Showdown's been around for a few weeks. Who's your favorite hero so far?

Spirit Showdown #3: The Vigilante

I don’t know if I’ve made it clear yet, but I have a thing for heroes.

Maybe that’s why I have so many issues with gritty stories.  If you’ll let me make a blanket statement or two, they’re largely about terrible people in terrible situations and terrible places doing terrible things.  Why not give me amazing people in a terrible world?  Or amazing situations and terrible things?  Or terrible situations with people doing amazing things?  And why not have the entire story (bar a few dark moments) be geared towards a happy ending, rather than a gritty story that heaps on the doom and gloom only to go “hey, maybe things won’t be so bad after all!” at the very end?  I know there are exceptions (Looper, The Dark Knight, and…well, arguably True Grit), but I’m pretty friggin’ sure there are a lot of gritty missteps.  O hai Gears of War 3, Max Payne 3, and Resident Evil 6.

I don’t mean to harp on gritty stuff all the time -- sometimes, but not all the time -- but I just want to make it clear where I stand.  Ideas and themes can be explored in any way, not just through certain aesthetics and conventions.  The moment you start to limit yourself is the moment you start to fail -- as a writer, as a creator, or just as a human being.  A show that’s (ostensibly) for children can be as deep and subtle as any other story out there if it wants to be; all it takes is a little ingenuity, some effort, and of course a strong spirit.  And in my opinion, a surefire, almost-universal way to appeal to everyone’s sensibilities -- young or old, naïve or jaded, silly or sophisticated -- is through the lens of a hero.  They inspire.  They excite.  They struggle, yet succeed anyway.  They move toward a conclusion by their own power.  A hero done right can be a tour de force; they have the power to make any story more amazing, more special, more meaningful, and of course more memorable.

In a sense, a good hero IS the story itself.  And I intend to prove that -- with this series, and ESPECIALLY with this post.

Spirit Showdown #2: The Monster

This may come as a bit of a surprise, but I used to think that I was some pretty hot stuff back in the day.  I was young (well, younger), I was excited, and I figured as long as I had a few meager ideas and some fighting spirit, I could become the greatest writer the world had ever seen.  It certainly helped that I actually started writing proto-versions of my stories -- stories that I’ve long since buried somewhere in the annals of my room and hope to never read again.  I know where they are, but I won’t say where -- you never know who’s reading your stuff online and might decide to storm your house for the sole purpose of exposing your embarrassing neophyte-bred material for all the world to see in an earnest effort to defame you before you can begin your long-imagined journey into the heroic pantheon of ages.  Or, you know, just laugh at you.

Anyway, I remember a time when I was at a friend’s birthday party, and I was talking with his sister -- a girl my age, and another close friend.  By then, I’d come up with five potential stories (proto-proto-versions, so you just KNOW they were high-quality), and saw fit to brag about them a bit.  But of course, I wasn’t quite satisfied.  I’d been dreaming up a sixth one, based on a certain inequality I’d perceived.  All of the leading heroes were male.  So I boasted that I had aims to make a sixth story starring a cool heroine, in spite of having little more to say than that…or that I was formulating the heroine’s design based on Soulcalibur II’s version of Sophitia.  It’ll be easy, I told myself in the midst of my grandstanding.  I’m smart enough -- writing a strong female character will be as easy as [insert whatever activity was common/popular at the time here]!

I mention this because in the near-decade since that party, no other character has changed as much as this next one.  And it’s extremely likely that she’ll change again before I even type her first words.  But for now, I’m in a good (or good enough) place with her. 

There’s just one tiny problem.  She’s a bit…extreme.

Spirit Showdown #1: The Driver

How many times have I used the phrase “I fancy myself a writer” in the past?  Let’s see…I think it’s coming up on…just about…ah, yes, fifteen thousand times.  And by fifteen thousand I mean eight.  And by eight I mean probably eight.

It’d be easier to call myself a writer if I had any credibility (i.e. a legion of devoted fans who await my fictitious gospel and launch assaults with a wave of my hand), but for what it’s worth, just being able to talk about stories, and analyze stories, and come up with stories has to count for something.  I’m not an authority, but I think at the very least I have the potential to be.  I mean, I’ve put more than a little thought into my stories.  One day when I was eleven I started daydreaming, and then I never stopped daydreaming.  That’d probably explain why I’m not an architect.

And what was I daydreaming about?  Well…