I Hraet You, Dimanagul

Huh.  I knew I was forgetting to do something.

Well, not really; it’s just that I prefer not to upload two posts a day because…arbitrary reasons.  But I didn’t want to wait any longer to make this announcement, primarily because I want to help out others -- chief among them, those that help me.  So here’s a marginally-official announcement.

I’ve made an open invitation for guest chapters of I Hraet You before -- and indeed, there is one up on the archive page already -- but for a while I was worried no one else would heed the call.  That is no longer a concern; earlier this week a Mr. Eric R. Jackson (a Cross-Up frequenter, if you check the comments here and there) uploaded his own take on the story.  With sexy results, one could argue.  So if you want to go over there and read what happens when someone else takes up the torch, do so.  And do it immediately.  And even beyond that, you should just spend a long-ass time perusing his blog, Memories of a Dimanagul.  It’s pretty friggin’ great…by which I mean it’ll probably make you a better person.  And we could all use a bit of that.

So go.  I’m ready for whatever else he’s got planned, and you should be too.  Keep checking back there for updates, and keep checking back here for chapters in the main canon.  No matter where you go, you’re bound to feel the love.  Because presumably, there’s no other place on the internet where you can find love -- especially not www.love.com.

NO, DON’T TRY AND LOOK IT UP FOR YOURSELF.  I once typed in fun.com one day because I was bored.  It did NOT go well.  Not at all.

I Hraet You (65)

Beat 65: Anyone Up for a Pun with Scales?

“Wait a minute.  Now just -- just hold on a minute,” said Trixie.  “What do you mean, ‘dead or alive’?  Why would my dad give an order like that?  Okay, yeah, I ain’t gonna say he’s the nicest guy around, but I woulda figured he’d keep himself from goin’ that far.  I mean, I…I’m his daughter, right?”

Mrs. Overdose couldn’t do much more besides shrug and keep driving down the road. 

“So you met my dad, then?”

“Not personally.  He just rounded up a bunch of hunters and gave ‘em orders -- bring you back, dead or alive.  He might’ve lucked out in findin’ me, but he might as well have just put a price on your head and thrown it into a pig pen.”  She pressed her lips down on her reed.  “It’s like all that mattered was gettin’ the job done.”

Kid's Game 2: Electric Boogaloo

You know, I’ve been thinking.  (Cue the screeches of a million feral kittens.)

I really don’t think there’s any other way for me to explain the issues I have with “gritty” stories.  I’ve gone on, and on, and on about them, and I’ve tried to justify my issues as best I could.  Some -- myself included -- might say I’m being unreasonable, and that’s probably true.  Some might agree with me.  And of course, there are some who probably disagree because, hey, maybe that grit is something genuinely attractive to people.  That’s fine.  I’m not going to tell anyone that they’re wrong for liking the things that they do…even if I don’t.

I know what I like, and I’ll gladly gravitate toward it.  And given the chance, I’ll defend it, and explain why I feel the way that I do.  Simple, yes?  I sure hope so.  Because I’m about to do it again.

Here’s the question at hand: are children’s shows the ultimate medium?

E3 2013: Hope Never Dies

*throws up hands* Well.  This is going to cause some problems.

I Hraet You (64)

Beat 64: The Interplay of Mediation and Murder

Lloyd took a seat and sighed -- and against all reason, put a smile on his face.  “Okay.  Well now…do either of you feel like talking about what happened?”

“There’s not really much to talk about,” said Jane.  She looked to Sheila, who blew her nose and nodded.  “These things just sort of happen, you know?  It’s nothing for you to concern yourself with -- especially since you’re a guest here.”

Lloyd’s eyes roved around.  Somehow, he couldn’t quite share the O’Leary family’s indifference.  For starters, only a quarter of the kitchen table remained; the rest of the wooden shards either lay on the floor, on in the hair of Sheila, Jane, and even Lloyd.  Drawers leaned against carved-up cabinets, and knives spread across the tile floor (thankfully, none of them had been dyed red).  The refrigerator doors hung on by a few measly screws, with no shortage of goods smashed wafer-thin.  The oven had exploded.  And even then, the chaos extended further -- the living room had overturned furniture, a shattered TV, bent lamps, and paintings that had likely seen use as clubs and hammers.

“Pardon my obtrusiveness,” said Lloyd, “but I think that when my life is put in danger, one could argue that it becomes my problem.”  In spite of being a third party, he’d taken the most hits; while the ladies had long since bandaged and patched up his wounds, he still looked more than a little tender.  The fact that his shirt and pants had “accidentally” gotten shredded and exposed fresh bandages didn’t help.

Neither did Sheila’s heated panting.  But then again, he could excuse that; she had every right to stare, considering that Lloyd (if not for his nearly-broken neck) would have done the same.

The Last of Us: A Pre-Discussion

I’m going to go ahead and be honest.  I really don’t know how I feel about The Last of Us right now.  

I know that’s unfair, but hear me out here.  If you’ve been reading this blog for long enough, you can probably pinpoint my tastes and preferences.  You know where I want to go with my own works.  And I’m pretty damn sure you know that I’ve been burned badly by plenty of recent releases.  So there’s no doubt in my mind that, even if the quality of the game is actually outstanding, and even if reviews that have started popping up have dished out high scores, I know that I have an unfair, unreasonable bias against The Last of Us.

But…really, can you blame me?  I don’t mind if you do -- because frankly, I blame myself.  And hopefully by the end of this post, I’ll be ready to dive into the game with a smile.

I Hraet You (63)

Beat 63: A Battlefield is No Place for Snacks

Even though he’d been offered such, and even with the scent of love-filled cookies wafting through the kitchen, somehow Lloyd couldn’t bring himself to keep his appetite.  “That’s quite the sense of humor, ma’am,” he said with an unnatural laugh.  “The way you speak, it sounds as if I’m in danger.  I would have assumed that as Miss O’Leary’s mother, you’d have thought her the one that needs protecting.”

“Oh no, I know my daughter’s strong enough to take care of herself,” Jane answered, offering her own laugh -- one several times more unnatural than Lloyd’s.  “It’s just that she can be so…so…”  She trailed off, though she kept an increasingly-eerie smile on her face as she moved from counter to counter.

“…So what, exactly?” Lloyd asked.

Jane looked back at him.  “Beg your pardon?”

“You started saying something about her, but you seem to have been at a loss for words.”

Jane pressed a hand to her cheek.  “Oh, I suppose I was, wasn’t I?”  She stared at Lloyd for a half minute.  “Oh well.”  And she went about her business once more. 

Something is definitely not right here, Lloyd thought.  Methinks I’d be in less danger if I tried to romance a shark.

The Volties: My Top 10 Video Game Songs

Blessed are the gamers, as I often say.  Well, not out loud.  Or in my head.  Or ever.  But I thought it once, I swear.

I may love video games, but I don’t need anyone telling me that there are things that they can and can’t do.  I’m more than aware of the flaws and faults of the medium.  That said, it IS interesting -- and harrowing -- to hear the words of someone who’s gotten in deep with game development, like this interview with game writer Susan O’Connor.  She outlines a few problems with the business, but in spite of that -- and in light of her work on several notable games, like BioShock, Far Cry 2, and the recent Tomb Raider -- I can’t help but think that she’s done good work, and it IS possible to get something more out of games with a little elbow grease.  In spite of that, I can’t help but think that she brings up a lot of legitimate points.  (I haven’t played the new Tomb Raider, but from what I’ve heard via TomBadguy’s review is true -- and there’s no doubt that it is -- the issues therein are proof enough of the problems.)

So let the records show: videogames have something very near or equal to ninety-nine problems, but more often than not music isn’t one of them.  So without further ado, these are my favorite video game songs.  (Though really, you can’t go wrong with just searching YouTube for Guilty Gear songs.  And on that note, how awesome is it that a new game is on the way?  Rashousen time, baby!)

I Hraet You (62)

Beat 62: More Bounce to the Sixteenth of a Pound

Patton looked down at his son, and pressed a paw against his shoulder.  “It’ll be all right.  I bet it’ll all work out in the end.”

JP didn’t return any of his compassion; he just stared out the van window, watching the town’s shops whiz past.  “It’ll work out because we’re bound to get involved,” he grumbled, his chin propped up with one hand.  “I’m starting to doubt anyone else can at this point -- and not just because of the usual ‘everyone but me is an idiot’ reason.”

“Mmmm.  Then that’s all the more reason to be at our best.”  He took a left turn.  “Can’t help anyone if we’re on an empty stomach.”

JP grunted.  Even ace detectives could use a meal every now and then.

Kingdom Hearts: Does Square-Enix Hate Women?

Apologies for the incendiary title, but I’m hard-pressed to think of anything more apt right now.

If you’ve been checking around this blog for a while -- and for that I thank you/apologize -- you may have noticed a particular running gag of mine.  See, if there’s one thing that I’ve noticed in the games by the now-bloated JRPG tyrant Square-Enix, it’s that the ladies in their games tend to be in less-than-admirable states.  It’s a consistent problem with this company, and while I wouldn’t say that it’s the only one at fault and/or worthy of blame, it is interesting -- and troubling -- to be able to trace a line from one nasty example to the next.  Hence the gag “Squeenix hates women.”

Now, to be fair, I’m sure there are some good examples of female characters out there in the company’s catalog.  I’m sure that there are some ladies who not only do the genre justice, but the medium at large.

Kingdom Hearts’ Aqua is not one of them.

Spoilers, as is the standard.  Then again, I’d assume if you had any interest in playing the game, you would have done so already.  So…callous spoilers, then?  Unfeeling spoilers?  Eh, let’s just go with “mild”.

Also, there’s NOT going to be mindless rage here.  Just a bit of a discussion.  Or a jumping off point.  Off a cliff.  Into Foot-In-Mouth Gorge, if I botch this.  So just work with me here.