I’m well-noted for being an optimist, but sometimes it’s pretty hard. That’s to be expected, sadly. Negativity is part and parcel of the World Wide Web these days, and with good reason: it’s a place where fans -- where those who care deeply about the things they love -- find out on a regular basis that something bad is about to go down. I try to counteract that here, but the woes of the video game industry and its mounting failures means that a lot of times, I have to get negative, too.
So you know what? It’s time to do something different. I want this to be a happy place, and I can think of one surefire way to do that: paying tribute to my mom. Today’s her birthday, after all, and she’s such a great person that I HAVE to give her the praise she deserves. I don’t do that enough, but that’s to be expected when you’re about as good with people as trying to spell the alphabet backwards…while on fire. (As evidenced by that curiously-morbid joke.) And seeing as how I have yet to encounter a greeting card that can cram several thousand words onto a folded piece of paper, this will have to do.
So gather ‘round. Have a seat. Because I’m going to wish my mom a happy birthday the only way anyone can: by giving 100% irrefutable proof that she’s the best in the universe.
It would be 110%, but doing that would require making the post’s title in all caps. And as per The Rules of the Internet, that would put the post's credibility in danger.